Are you suffering from FOMO - The Fear of Missing Out!

FOMO - The Fear of Missing Out!

The New Lifestyle Disorder!!!  

What is FOMO?

FOMO is the fear of missing out on something more interesting or more exciting than what we are doing right now. There is a fear that something might be happening while we are busy in our real life.

FOMO is a social disorder that causes anxiety at not being able to decide which of multiple equally fun-sounding events to be a part of.

FOMO is both an addiction and a phobia. We may suffer from it and not even realize it.

FOMO happens when we invalidate the experience we're having because we're obsessed with the ones we're not having.

FOMO victims are always stressed about what they are missing rather than enjoying what they have in hand.

Remember - The more we fear it, the more we tend to miss out.

FOMO Symptoms

·         Texting while sitting in your car at the red light of an intersection

·         Checking your Twitter stream while out for coffee with a friend

·         Answering your cell phone when you are eating dinner with family members

·         Checking our social networks in a coffee shop with a friend 

Reasons of suffering with FOMO

Strong urge to stay connected with our friends, be it while driving, working, eating, and even while in bed.

We don't want to be alone, and the feeling is so intense that even when we have decided to disconnect, we decide to check with our online presence just to make sure we stay updated.

When we see pictures of our friends having fun at a party that we didn't attend, we go through these emotions wherein we feel left out…

People are always looking for some kind of action. They want a higher level of acceptance in social circumstances and want to be seen as someone who has multiple contacts, which is a sign of affluence and control. When someone misses a particular party, they end up making several calls to find out what happened at the party as they feel left out.

This happens when there is extreme dependence on external approval.

Social media and FOMO

Social media acts as a fuel on FOMO's fire

But what's bad for individuals may just be good for Facebook: People high in FOMO were also more likely to use social media, seemingly driven by a need to see what's going on when they're not around.

So people are glued to their smartphones, obsessively checking mails, WhatsApping, BBMing, texting, or posting on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or individual blogs.

These people are always attuned to the outside world and fear that others are having better experiences.

This is indeed one disorder that we can blame on fast-advancing technology.

As people post their minute-by-minute activities, thoughts, spotlight moments and achievements on social networking sites, it causes envy and restless inadequacy amongst others.

Often we go to bed in deep distress after a session on Facebook. The fact that I’m sitting up in bed on social networking sites makes me feel like such a loser compared to friends tweeting photos from holidays or from happening bars or parties where they are rubbing shoulders with the best.

We need to understand that people exaggerate on social networking sites because everyone wants to project their best side to the world. In that sense, what people with FOMO hanker for isn’t even real.

When Envy Works

In a controlled environment FOMO can be very motivating and encouraging to keep us connected to other people and ideas.

We should use our FOMO as a catalyst to set realistic goals. We can use what other people are doing as inspiration.

Our goal is to let FOMO inspire us to live better, not let it ruin our fun.

FOMO-Free

Let’s promise to each other that as we read this article we will be FOMO-free.

·         We will not worry about what others are doing.

·         We will not get stressed about what else we could be doing.

·         We will not worry about our friends who didn’t accept our friend invite on FB.

·         We will take time away from social media. Doing so will allow us more time to focus on work, household tasks, and activities with family and friends.

·         Let other people in your social media networks know when you are busy to help lower your feelings of being overwhelmed. This will help manage expectations of your followers and they will appreciate your honesty. You let them know that your absences are not personal and are instead about prioritization.

Let’s turn the fear of missing out within and figure out what we would most like to do for our own selves, independent of others.

What is it that enhances life for us?

What gives us a feeling of completion and satisfaction?

Let us focus on our own bucket list, rather than on fake ones created by others!

Let’s identify our PURPOSE OF LIFE and work on to achieve the same.
find purpose of life

Life is all about Balance, You Get what you Give!

It's all about quality of life and finding a happy balance between work and friends and family.

Just as your car runs more smoothly and requires less energy to go faster and farther when the wheels are in perfect alignment. Similarly, we perform better when our thoughts, feelings, emotions, goals, and values are in balance!

Balance your acts and thoughts...

·         When we follow our heart; we must ensure that we also follow your mind

·         When we show up; we must get in touch with Nature

·         Find people you love you; Express your love to the people whom you want to 

·         When we are Happy; we must ensure that we Introspect

·         Dance; Read books

·         When we find a new perspective; we must ensure that we do just what we like

·         Help others; seek help

·         Have a good night sleep; Have night out to gossip with your old friends 

·         Give flowers to people you love; buy yourself flowers

·         Set your goals; Don’t compare yourself with others

·         Spend time with God; keep the romance in your life

·         Make a gratitude List; make your desired funeral speech

·         Want what you have; create a list of things you aspire

·         Pamper your loved one; pamper yourself…

·         Have a sense of wonder; enjoy natural beauty

·         Make time to just have Fun; face you fears…

·         Exercise; watch Television

·         Lighten UP; be open to new Ideas

·         Don’t beat yourself up; be true to yourself

·         Go to Museum; be a couch potato

·         Focus on creating whatever you desire; focus on negative thoughts

Life makes you run in every direction and all you have to do is choose best one!

Happiness is not a matter of intensity; but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony.
find purpose of life

Life's a Roller Coaster – Enjoy the Ride

Life and Roller Coaster

·         Both come in many shapes, designs, and colors.

·         Both start with a big drop; both have ups and downs. It doesn’t really matter if we sit in the front or the back — everyone has a similar experience.

·         Both require participation – watching just isn’t the same; both are more fun when shared with others.

·         Both can be fun for a minute and terrifying the next; sometimes it's thrilling, other times it's scary; both can make you scream and throw up.

·         Both require that you follow the rules for your safety.

·         Both go very fast and don’t last long enough.

All times are not same, be it how we spend 24 hours in a day, 7 days in a week, 30 days of a month, 12 months in a year, 10 years in a decade, etc…
We should try to live a balanced life – should not over enjoy triumphs and bravely overcome/ handle low tides.
Our reaction when the “Going is not Good”

How often have we said – “Can't Handle this Anymore!!!”

Times when we feel like there is no one can help us; Times when we are convinced that we are without hope; Times when we are in depression; Times when we feel irritated; Times when our family and friends begin to hate us because we are just constantly giving them attitude; Times when nothing seems to be working; Times when everything seems to be falling leaking through the cracks.

·         Self-victimization - We ask ourselves “Why is this happening to me? Why am I so unlucky? Why doesn’t this happen to anyone else? It’s not fair!”

·         Reacting in anger - We lash back at the situation, or even people around us, for what’s happening.

·         Self-blame - We make self-depreciating comments like “Why am I so stupid to have done that?” “Only someone like me can make such a dumb mistake.”

·         Slipping into depression - We may slip in depression if we’re not careful at managing our emotions.

·         Dejection or giving up - We lose hope, or worse still, we give-up. We decide it’s not worth it, that life is out to get us, and we should just stop trying altogether.

What do you do when bad times come? How do you handle it?  What is your attitude when your well-laid plans crumble into disaster?
“We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.”
We need to learn to cope up with bad times with perseverance and patience. Trials come for a reason; Bad times are not an end to themselves. They are designed to produce something in our life. The testing of our faith produces endurance. 
Control and Manage our Anxiety

Anxiety is the type of condition that can at times feel so overwhelming that we are convinced that we'll never be able to live a happy life - or live the life that we have always wanted.

But the truth is that anxiety itself is what causes this feeling.

Anxiety has the ability to make your life feel like we are without hope.

We can be cured, and we can find relief, but the only way to find that relief is to commit to the idea that anxiety help exists. That's why, when we feel like it's too much, we have two options:

·         Sit and do nothing, and live with anxiety forever.

·         Commit to change and start on our way to recovery.

Learning to Cope in the Short Run (Quick-Fix / First-Aid)

·         Share - Turn on the TV and lights. Call your close friend / Mentor / Role Model and talk about anything and everything that is in our mind.

·         Physical Exercise - Go out for a very fast run, and when we get tired, wait until we regained some of our strength and run again. Tire out our body so strongly that we can't even think about your physical worries. We can also punch a punching bag or yell as loudly as possible as long as possible. Do all of them if we need to.

·         Jot down in your diary - Anxiety sometimes causes thoughts to roll out of control. They're simply thoughts that we can't stop thinking about. Write them all out. Write down everything that is in our head, and every thought that comes up. Once it's out of our head, we should find ourselves thinking less about it.

·         Accepting and Creating a Plan - Finally, when it feels hopeless right now, we need to give ourselves an opportunity to stop focusing on how it feels now and get ready for how it's going to improve in the future.

Step I - Tell our self that it's okay for us to have anxiety. We need to accept it instead of trying to fight it, because acceptance is the most important tool for believing us that we can overcome it.

Step II – Create a long term plan for the future, with the things we are going to do to find relief/solution.

Are we going to see a therapist? Are we going to ask our doctor about medications? Are we planning on exercising? Are we going to look for a new job, or find any new friends? What if we still suffer from anxiety – what changes will we make?

Decide on what we are going to do and plan it out for the long term – not just days, not just weeks, but months and even years. Having that plan ensures that we are focused on our future, so that what we deal with in the present becomes less important.

Learning to Cope in the Long Run (Permanent Cure)

We simply need to avoid certain traps:

·         Believing we can cure it on our own.

·         Believing that our anxiety is worse / different.

·         Believing that if a treatment doesn't work in a week or so, it's not going to work.

Release your Stress/Frustrations - Don’t bottle them out because we might just collapse. The problem will still remain whether we go berserk at it or whether we think about it calmly. The former will create more problems as our agitation prevents us from making good decisions. Being frustrated isn’t going to solve anything. Talk to a friend about it. A listening ear does wonders. Go exercise and release the tension. Write in your diary.

Don’t self-victimise - No matter what we may think, we are not alone in this. Somewhere around the world, someone else is thinking the exact same thing as we. Someone out there is feeling down and out too, wondering why he/she is experiencing this. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimising mindset.

Know we always have a choice - Realize no matter what happens, we always have a choice in how we react. While we may not be able to control what happens to us, we can most certainly control our behaviors. We can face the worst things in the world, but if we make the choice not to let our self be affected by them, we won’t be.

Think Objectively - An incident is an incident; we’re responsible for the feelings attached. Remove the feelings and look at the situation objectively. This will help us cope a lot better.

Create an Action Plan – Focus on what we can do; Action creates empowerment. Actions create possibilities. Action creates results. By taking action, we are no longer a passive recipient; we are a conscious creator.

Ask for help if you need to - It’s okay to ask for help if it makes the situation easier and if it helps. Remember, we are not alone in this.

See it as an obstacle to be overcome - Life is a journey of learning and growth, and everything happens for a reason. Obstacles are the things stopping us from getting our goals, and if we keep overcoming these obstacles, we’ll eventually get what we want.

Identify the lessons learned - There are always things to be learned from every situation to cope up with similar situations in future.

No matter what bad stuff life throws our way, nothing can get us down, as long as we cope with it constructively.
find purpose of life

Difference between Prayer and Worship?

Prayer is supplication; Worship is adoration.

Prayer is a request; Worship is thanks giving for answering your request.

Prayer is a conversation with God; Worship is an expression of gratitude for the outcome of the conversation.

Prayer is selfish; Worship is not selfish.

Prayer leads to spiritual progress. Worship leads to ritual progress - Worship is based on ritualism, whereas prayer is based on spirituality. Prayer leads to spiritual accomplishment, whereas worship leads to ritual accomplishment. Prayers lead us to the attainment of your goals.

Prayer is a form of worshiping God. Our prayer can be a message to Him that we love Him and are thankful for everything He has done for us. Prayer is also a way to ask God about things or for things. This includes asking God for good health for family or friends, courage and resilience in times of stress, and comfort whenever we need His help. God tells us that He gives us what we ask for as long as it is in His name, or within His will.

Prayer extends beyond just asking God for things. It acts as a way of conversation between yourself and God, in such a way that your relationship with Him will grow. Just as no friendship can truly grow without fellowship, so is it with our relationship with the Lord. Without prayer, we cannot get closer to Him.

Prayer is the act of communicating with God, it means having a quiet time with God and talking to God about yourself. Prayer refers to communication. It can mean confession, making requests or prayer according to God's will. Quite literally it means speaking to God or an act of thanks.
Prayer is a communion with the whole (God or nature or existence as you see it) where you get connected to the whole.

Worship is, in its simplest form, revering God and recognizing all He has done. We worship God because He deserves to be worshiped. When you think about all He has done through His creation and salvation, God is shown to be a very powerful and loving God, and through worship we can show our love and respect to Him. In fact, our existence, our ability to think, even our very ability to worship in the first place comes from Him. Should we not then use those to convey our love to Him?

Worship is an expression of reverence and adoration of God, such could be through singing songs, praying, chanting, dancing in the presence of God. Worship refers to specific acts of religious praise and devotion, and the honouring of God, a form of expression or an act of prayer in praise to God. It is an expression of love for God.

Worship is intense adoration... love and respect.

Sukh Vele Shukrana - Pay gratitude in times of happiness, (Thank Him during good times)

Dukh Vele Ardaas - Pray to HIM at times of crisis, (Pray during crisis)

Har Vele Simran - Remember Him at all times (Worship at all times)
find purpose of life

Are you afraid of losing your loved ones?

Crippling fear of losing loved ones, whom we love dearly…

Fear of death is a natural human emotion. Fear of Loss of a loved one is the worst thing anyone can handle...

The fear of losing a loved one is always in existence. We can never get away from this fear because there are situations that will make a person think of the possibility of being separated from the people they love. But the possibility of losing someone is one of life's facts and no one can prevent this from happening.

What is the reason for this Fear

This fear can be caused or influenced by several factors such as, Divorce or separation, Empty nest, Death in the family, etc…

The reason why we have this fear is due to the fear of being alone in this world and our fear of not being able to bear the thought of being the one who was left behind.

How do I overcome this Fear

A fear can consume a person’s thoughts, which can increase their fear and make it harder to get over. It is important to overcome those fears so that you can live your daily life in peace and free from needless worry.

Realize that death is an inevitable part of life. While the time spent by every one of us is different, the end result of life is always the same.

The best way to handle a fear is to tell someone who is trust worthy.  Confiding in another person allows them to help you and better understand the other person’s fear.  If a person is afraid to tell someone about their fear because they are embarrassed by it, then they can always keep a journal of all their thoughts and let their heart spill out with a pen and paper rather than tell someone.

Spend more time with your loved ones. Show them how much you care and how much you value having them in your life. None of us knows when our time is up. The more good memories you have of that person, the better you'll be able to handle your grief.

Losing a loved one is natural and death is a cycle. 

Remember, when a person dies, there will always be new life being born into the world.
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